kings and fools

Tonight David Cole of BK Derby fame and I went to the other BK—Burger King—for the first time in years for either of us. He got the steakhouse burger, some grilled sirloin looking thing that appeared to occupy a good 3/4″ space between top and bottom bun. I stuck with the classic Whopper but paid little attention to what was in it. The fries were piping hot and the coke was watery. We ate in what I remember was silence. Afterward we headed to the beach on Jamaica Bay by the Crossbay Bridge. Dave just got these new waders from Orvis he was stoked to try out and I just got this wading jacket to keep dry in while wading around the bay and in the rain, should it ever rain again this summer. Yeah, summer. What happened to Spring? Last Sunday was 55 degrees and tomorrow (Friday) is going to be 85. Anyhow, I digress…

We got to the beach with little concern for the potential effects the King could have on standing in the bay in waders for the next couple hours. There were a bunch of chunkers all around, so we picked a spot away from them. It was almost dead low tide so we were able to wade out pretty far. My jacket worked pretty well—it’s not a dry top but it was really lightweight, waterproof and breathable, and the adjustable sleeve cuffs kept the water out of the jacket, something I tested a few times by trying to tie my boots underwater a bunch of times. It also has these two big pockets up front to carry stuff in, so I had my phone and camera, both wrapped in Ziploc bags, in them as well as my car keys. We casted out over and over to little avail except for some sea grass. Dave was hauling this heavy baitcasting rod over his shoulder like it was a medieval great sword, the kind you have to use with huge back muscles and two hands. When it got wet it only got heavier. When he handed it to me to hold for a second I almost dropped it into the water as I wasn’t expecting it to be that heavy. Surprisingly, like man and monster trucks, it floats.

The bugs came out in force even though we were about 80 yards off the beach. Dave got a couple hits and I got a good one on a Mag Darter. I missed it obviously, otherwise I would be writing about my first fish of the year and not the bugs flying in my face distracting me, nor the OFF bug spray I left in the car unused. The tide started coming in so we thought about moving back a little bit. I spied Dave in a picturesque pose, smoking while backlit by the Crossbay Bridge. I reached into one of those big front pockets and pulled out my camera. “We at least have to prove we were out here,” I said. I pushed the “ON” button but nothing happened. “Huh, are these pockets not waterproof?” I asked, stupidly*. I opened the Ziploc bag† and a bunch of water poured out. I checked my other pocket that had my phone in it. The screen stayed a beautiful stoic black. I had assumed wrong.

“It’s cool, dude. I got my camera,” Dave said. He reached in his bag, which he also thought was waterproof, and pulled out his camera. He also assumed incorrectly.

So we have no pictures to show you.

A few hits, a learning experience for two boneheads standing in the middle of the bay. We’re getting closer. I might be back out tomorrow night. And again, it’s past 2AM…


*It turns out the front of the pocket is indeed waterproof, to shield one from the elements of wind and rain, but the bottom of the pocket, the part that was soaking in the bay, is quite water permeable. Just a friendly FYI.
†It turns out Ziploc bags aren’t waterproof either, even though I clearly made yellow and blue make green.


2 thoughts on “kings and fools

  1. the preacher says:

    Yeah it takes a phone soaking to force one to stop using kiplocks as waterproofing. Double them up and they can be water resistant to guard against big splashes, but still not safe to submerge for any amount of time. I am from Rain country Vancouver and I have had lots of experience not waterproofing things properly. Thanks for sharing , you just probably saved many other peoples electronics by humbly sharing this bit of gold.

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